oldsunbird

"I have been more outrageous and more alone and more courageous than the world has known. Passerby, my heart is like your own."

A New Old Grief

What mother wants to remember

the death of her child?

One happened in August

when the sun was fierce and

the air stood still.

Grass burned and

lakes dried out, and he

no longer wanted to live.

Another, in February

after a short illness;

an ice storm locked doors,

froze flowers;

bent, broken, they

lay on the ground,

mourners footprints

covered by ice,

the earth unmoving..

Birthdays, Christmas, 4th of July,

other holidays.

It seems every month is a cause

for grief.

And I ask myself,

Is this why I’m here—

to guide and love and cherish,

to watch them die

before they have

a chance to live,

to let them go

before my own life

ends?

(c) Mary Harrison, 2012

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13 thoughts on “A New Old Grief

  1. September 15th, 2009…my daughter Crystal Xzan left this world after the monster cancer ate her alive, but she fought valiantly for eleven months after they told her she only two weeks to live…and she left with a smile…her mother holding her hand, trying to be brave to the last breath and reassure her that there is a heaven and we would be together again…since then…this world is empty…this writer can write about anything except her daughter…because she is afraid that she could never do justice to light that was an angel on earth and now charms other angels in heaven…

    • I’m so sorry for the loss of your daughter. Our children are supposed to survive us, aren’t they? I was lucky to be able to be with one of my sons, also, and hold his hand as he died.

  2. Beautifully haunting! Thanks for sharing!

  3. Very sad poem. Evocative, too.

  4. This one made me cry…
    Hugs and love to you, dear Mary xx

  5. Oh, Mary. You’ve made me cry…

  6. I’m sorry. Knowing that you’ve lost two sons makes this very poignant.

  7. Dear Mary … this was sad and lovely at the same time. I’m so sorry for your losses. Once again, I find myself wanting to spend time with you – to share a cup of tea and talk about everything. Hugs to you, Mary.

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